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Football and Season Tickets

I admit that I don't understand every nuance of football.  I don't know how my husband spots all those penalties before the referee announces them; I don't get why these guys are paid millions of dollars even though they don't last through the first game of the season (sorry, Nick Foles); and, aren't those skin tight pants uncomfortable? Don't even get me started on the mysteries of jock straps (I really don't  want to know...blech!).

My parents were both football fans.  My father grew up in Pittsburgh, so he was loyal to the Steelers.  My mother supported the Eagles because we lived in the Philadelphia area.  She loved the kickoff, and got really upset if she missed it.  I remember my parents watching football on television as they drank their martinis (gin and extra dry vermouth with olives or cocktail onions) and/or Manhattans (bourbon and sweet red vermouth with maraschino cherries).  Apparently, watching football games requires alcohol consumption, some…

Envy and Gratitude

I am guilty of envy.  I envy people around me.  I envy their homes, their relationships, their intelligence, their youth, their good looks, their accomplishments, their...well, you get it.  It's a problem.

Both of my children tell me at least some of the truth about my faults, maybe not all of my faults, but the obvious and troubling ones.  They have noticed my tendency to envy others.  While this stuff can be tough to hear, I am glad that they feel they can be honest with me.  God knows I would never say anything like that to my mother!!!  Dire consequences would ensue, people would suffer.  Nope. 

I went through a phase where I really wanted a gazebo in my back yard.  Why?  Because somebody else had one.  Do I need a gazebo?  No.  My back yard is lovely and calming.  It is full of birds, bird baths, bird feeders, the occasional raccoon, stray cat, and lots of armadillos.  It brings me great joy.  I think I'm over the whole gazebo thing, but it may rear its ugly head if we go t…

Pickleball

One of the delusions I had about my retired self is that suddenly I would  want to exercise, like really crave it.  This is similar to the delusion I had about suddenly having the burning desire to clean my house.  Neither of these things has happened; shocking.

Today I tried pickleball at the YMCA.  I do attend Pilates classes there twice a week (if I wake up in time...), and my more motivated husband plays tennis three times a week.  He's been retired much longer than I have, which explains the difference in our levels of motivation.   Anyway, he encouraged me to give pickleball a shot at the 9:30 a.m. session.  His tennis ends at 9, so he figured he and I could learn together.  There are so many reasons why this was NOT a good idea.  First, and honestly, most important, my husband takes medication for his heart.  I really do worry about him doing too much.  Second, the instructor told me after our session that he discourages couples from learning pickleball together.  I understa…

Random thoughts on retirement

I've been retired for almost six months.  Here are some random thoughts on my status thus far.I miss my colleagues!  I knew I would miss them, I just didn't realize how much a part of my life they had become.  I especially miss the laughter we shared.  Thank God for my WW meetings; my friends and I have lots of laughs there.  Also, I think I'm finally winning over some of the folks at my Pilates class, although a few of those ladies are really cranky.  I blame planking. (planky cranky!!!)I miss being called "Doctor McGlone."  Well, you know I worked long and hard on that damned PhD!!!  Outside of academia, the folks in my new world probably don't care too much about my doctoral status.  It meant a lot to me; I guess it still does.I took my awesome employee benefits for granted.  Health insurance is necessary and very costly.  If you have benefits, be grateful!!!Meetings: most were painful, some were bearable, and a few could be fun.  The worst meetings were t…

Domesticity: no more excuses

So many things I thought would happen when I retired.  For example, I really believed that, once I had no work obligations, I would feel the ever elusive desire to clean my house.  I mean, I would really enjoy cleaning my house, scrubbing the toilets, dusting, vacuuming, etc.  You know: endless chores that, no matter how often you do them, they just need to be done AGAIN and AGAIN.  Who doesn't love that?!  

Is there some pill I can take to arouse sheer joy at the thought of housekeeping? Like Viagra for vacuuming? For some reason, I still don't enjoy cleaning, despite the amount of free time I have.  I would much rather spend hours binge watching Doc Martin, or Midsomer Murders, or anything...I can find a lot of excuses for not cleaning the house.  Going down endless rabbit holes on Ancestry.com can use up an entire afternoon.  When I finally force my sorry self to clean, scrub, dust, vacuum, etc., I feel really good about it (when it's over).  I feel accomplished, and pro…

Headaches, Migraines, and Xanax

About ten years ago, I had the frightening experience of seeing diamond shaped objects zig-zagging across my field of vision.  It was distracting enough that I couldn't read or drive.  I called my doctor.  Her primary concern was that I might have had a transient ischemic attack, or mini-stroke.  After lots of tests, they found no evidence of a stroke.  It was a migraine.  I've had a few more of them over the years; one of them was the dreaded "vomiting migraine" where I had to stay in my bedroom, in the dark, lying still until it passed.  I still get the occasional migraine, but I recognize it and it doesn't frighten me.  

I have always had headaches, even when I was a child.  I remember coming home from school with my head aching so much that I had to lie down before I could eat dinner or attack my homework.  This went on and got worse through the years.  I regret all the time that I missed with my family because I had to rest and have my "alone time" …

Cockroaches Ate My Dishwasher

Actually, the cockroaches ate and pooped on my dishwasher computer board, and it died having lost its innards.  As I discovered when cockroaches invaded my Keurig, those suckers love dark and damp spaces.  The dishwasher is dark and damp (I assume, as I've never been inside it when it is closed...).  Also, the dishwasher has tiny pieces of food on the items I place in there before I turn it on with its damned computer board.  Cockroaches love tiny pieces of food. 

Did you know that you can't buy a dishwasher that doesn't have a computer board?  Since we've lost two (!!!) dishwasher computer boards in the last two years, I guess we didn't learn anything when the first one fell victim.  It's cheaper to buy a new dishwasher than it is to replace the damned computer board, what with labor and all that.  Geesh.

Because we live in Florida, we have bugs.  Really, there is no escape from the bugs; they love this hot humid weather. (I'm getting pretty damned sick of t…