Envy and Gratitude

I am guilty of envy.  I envy people around me.  I envy their homes, their relationships, their intelligence, their youth, their good looks, their accomplishments, their...well, you get it.  It's a problem.

Both of my children tell me at least some of the truth about my faults, maybe not all of my faults, but the obvious and troubling ones.  They have noticed my tendency to envy others.  While this stuff can be tough to hear, I am glad that they feel they can be honest with me.  God knows I would never say anything like that to my mother!!!  Dire consequences would ensue, people would suffer.  Nope. 

I went through a phase where I really wanted a gazebo in my back yard.  Why?  Because somebody else had one.  Do I need a gazebo?  No.  My back yard is lovely and calming.  It is full of birds, bird baths, bird feeders, the occasional raccoon, stray cat, and lots of armadillos.  It brings me great joy.  I think I'm over the whole gazebo thing, but it may rear its ugly head if we go to a home show, or visit someone else who has a gazebo.  

There are parts of my body that I hate:  my thick upper arms, my jiggly skin (this is only going to get worse), my red nose (sun damage), my deep set eyes...well, I could go on, but who cares?  Not a damned thing I can do about it, short of surgical solutions.  Nah. 

I think that the antidote to envy is a combination of self-awareness, honest self-assessment, and gratitude.  So, I hate my arms; but I have arms, and legs, and other body parts that are still in working condition.  I am grateful for my functioning body, and for the fact that I've never had to suffer the loss of limbs, eyesight, hearing, etc.  Functional loss will come as I age, but I'm still here, and I'm doing well.  I'm grateful. 

I have a home that is comfortable.  We can afford to keep it cool in the summer and warm in the winter.  My children are healthy and relatively settled in their lives.  My husband loves me and takes care of me.  Sometimes I'm pretty freaking needy, and the man puts up with that stuff.  God bless him.  I have friends, not lots of friends, but good and caring friends, the kind that I know I can call and they will be there if I need them.  I have enough to eat...probably too much to eat.  Sometimes when I sit in my WW meeting on Saturday mornings, I think to myself that eating too much is a problem that many people in our world would love to have.  

Every day I fight the fight against envy, and every day I find so much for which to be grateful.  I know I am blessed by whatever God or good fortune or universal karma keeps me alive and functioning.  Today is really as good as I decide it will be.  


  1. Did I read that armadillos bring you great joy. Surely not - ha!

    I envy your bubbly spirit; I am more sedate, I suppose. But like you, I am full of gratitude today, the best antidote to envy in my humble opinion.

    Thanks for showing your vulnerability. here Happy new year, Victoria!

    1. Happy New Year to you, Marian!!! I love seeing your posts on FB; you and your handsome husband are such a wonderful couple. Thank you for your continued encouragement. Because you are a brilliant writer, and for many other reasons, your support means more than I can say.

      I love armadillos! I saved one that fell into our pool and was drowning. The little guy (he wasn't full grown) was just so cute. My husband doesn't appreciate all the tunneling the armadillos do in our yard; I think they're amazing. :-)

    2. Your're still da bomb, Victoria!

      My husband tried to shoot "our" armadillo with a rifle - no luck!


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